Lady Manson (ladymanson) wrote,
Lady Manson
ladymanson

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Need some grammar help from all you smart grammar people...


I need some grammar help and I made the mistake of posting this to Yahoo Answers first. God, I love some of the people over there...

Okay, I'm doing an initial edit of my novel (which I feel I should avoid since it's not even done, but find myself doing it anyway) and I am wondering if this is grammatically correct. The novel is in first person, so it is in past tense. I am worried about the last sentence because it begins with the word 'knowing'. I don't know if it is okay to open a sentence in first person past tense with a verb like that.

Editing messes with my head because all the grammar rules get mixed up after reading too much. But I want to edit this properly before sending it to an actual editor because I don't want to look like a moron. I could have sworn I had seen people use grammar like this in first person past tense published stories before, but I could just be remembering things wrong. I figure if I get this figured out now, I'll avoid doing it in the future. I'd rather have to go back and re-edit 160 page now than add more mistakes to fix later.

'My eyelids fluttered against the cotton of the pillow, waking me from a much needed sleep. Although it had only been for a few hours, to my best estimate, I was thankful for it. I crawled out from under his arm and slid off the side of the bed. He was still asleep, probably better than he had been before. Knowing that I had fallen asleep would have put his mind at ease for at least a little while.'

Thank you!

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